Empty

A few weeks ago, we were sitting at our meeting, after talking about our book and as worship began I closed my eyes with a heavy heart. I just thought about all the times I come running back to God, how his renewal is like a glass of water in the desert.

I often let myself get spiritually dehydrated before running back for that refreshing and renewing water.  I realized that sometimes I need to empty my proverbial glass of all the other stuff in it. All the other things I try to fill my life with, and realize that I am empty without his spirit. What I perceive to be filling me up is deceiving and distracts from my need for the spiritual hydration. The same analogy was in the next chapter of the book we are reading and discussing, Wayne Cordiero’s, Leading on Empty. The chapter mentioned that, in a long-distance run, if you wait to drink water when you are really feeling thirsty, the damage is already done. You can’t wait until you are dehydrated to fuel yourself if you want to go the distance.

Thinking about the lowest times in my life, when I have been depressed and brokenhearted, those were often the times I craved God’s spirit the most. At rock bottom, that’s when you become sensitive to the spirit, you realize how much you really need it. So I have been feeling like I need to make some changes in my life. Some drastic changes. I am praying more about what that means for me. I want to really alter my habits and bring all of my time/effort, worship to Him. So many things tear my gaze away from my beloved’s but I find everything in Him! Time to let go of distractions, and make radical changes in my life to focus only on communion with the Lord’s spirit.

As I’ve been  praying about this, I pictured running without losing energy, running across the world, never looking back, just running onward. Through mountains and canyons, it looked so beautifully freeing. This holds a special place in my heart. I often have dreams of running, to the point where I am almost flying, I feel so free. I thought of the same verse I included in one of my last posts.

Isaiah 40:30-31 says, “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Pray with me as I keep running towards him. Pray that I would continually have the discipline to empty myself of all the other distractions and empty fillers. I pray that we would all find Jesus as our only source. Unlike the empty fillers, the worldly relationships, and sources of energy and fulfillment, He will never run out or hurt us.  Do you ever notice yourself running on fillers, never feeling truly full? Do you ever find yourself in that perpetual cycle of running yourself dry before refueling? I love to hear stories and chat so message me at the1movement(at)live.com or comment any time!

Khulna (Part 1)

Khulna…

I have long anticipated our journey to Khulna to work with some local organizations including Akhi’s Place, a home for girls whose mothers are sex workers. Khulna is a southern city in Bangladesh, a bit slower paced thank Dhaka and Sylhet even, and gorgeous! Since the morning we left, it has been an adventure. From the sea plane, to the boat, to Bengali man’s office, to a microbus, to another boat across the river, to an auto-rickshaw, to the guest house. And then some. After arriving, we began to hear about what we would be doing the coming week. And of course most of the plans changed. That is the fun of being overseas. You hear one thing and you get a completely different experience than you expected, or prepared for sometimes. But you learn to expect and prepare for the unexpected. We have been traveling with a local pastor, getting to speak at schools, orphanages, churches, adult learning centers, and more. It has been a challenge in many ways, but so much fun.

Teamwork…

One of the exciting things, is seeing how we would grow as a team each time. We have been having at least two programs to go to/run everyday, so it’s usually an all day ordeal. And we have found out that most places you go, you should expect to have songs, games and messages prepared. Through trial and error we have found the games that people love, and some that are very hard to explain through translation. We have learned new songs, thought of old ones, made up actions on the spot, and sang in broken Bangla.

Seizing the moment…

One of the things that I have been excited about is speaking. I have really been growing in confidence, and I am feeling more comfortable speaking and preparing messages with every time. As I was sitting with a group of college age majority background students who were expecting me to give a testimony that I hadn’t prepared for, it hit me… This isn’t a performance. These people need God, and this is my chance. This is my time! So my gears shifted and I decided to seize the moment, not worrying about the perfect words, or how I would appear but this intense desire to communicate God’s love for them, and how his loved has changed my life. The people responded extremely well to us and were very eager to learn more. One of the things each of us had mentioned in our testimony was how God had spoke to us about different things, and some of the people thought we were joking… How could we talk to God?? They hadn’t heard of that concept, and they wanted to know more. I am praying that we planted a seed that would take root in their hearts.
I am your child, Lord Jesus, I am your child…

One of the most touching moments for me this past week was when we went to a girls home/orphanage and school… Before we would do our program they had us come sing some of their songs with them. I stood there looking at these 150 girls standing in their shalwar kameezes of every color… singing a simple and heart-capturing song  a ‘cappella…

I am your child, Lord Jesus, I am your child… (x2)

Every day, every hour I can feel your cleansing power

 I am your child, Lord Jesus, I am your child…

Hold my hand, Lord Jesus, hold my hand…  (x2)

Every day, every hour I can feel your cleansing power

Hold my hand, Lord Jesus, hold my hand…  (At this point they all took each others hands holding them in the air.)

Take me through, Lord Jesus, take me through…(x2)

 Every day, every hour I can feel your cleansing power

Take me through, Lord Jesus, take me through…

Make me stand, Lord Jesus, make me stand. (x2)

Every day, every hour I can feel your cleansing power

Make me stand, Lord Jesus Make me stand.

Listening to all of the girls sing those words so genuinely, thinking about those words really mean to them, I couldn’t sing the words. I tried to mouth the words along with them as I choked back tears and thanked God for his redeeming love for them. Times like these, there are no words.

These girls, most of them without parents to love and care for them, singing I am your child, Lord Jesus, I am your child. Girls, who likely have felt abandoned and alone and helpless, singing  Hold my hand, Lord Jesus, hold my hand.  Girls who face hopelessness,  poverty, abuse, feelings of worthlessness, singing  Take me through, Lord Jesus, take me through. Girls, who are viewed as invaluable and insignificant in their society and often in their own families, singing  Make me stand, Lord Jesus, make me stand. I fight tears thinking about it. What courage. What surrender. Under each scarf, behind each pair of eyes, there is a story. But each of them placed their trust in the Lord, knowing he was enough to cover every story, every past, and every future. Joy Jishu. Victory is in Him. Peace and healing are in Him. Value is found in Him.

Thanks for reading, friends. I have thoroughly enjoyed my time down south, and look forward to sharing more in another post in the near future, Khulna (Part 2). Much love!

Brokenhearted

Today I am brokenhearted. I’m brokenhearted for Bangladesh, I’m brokenhearted for broken people. I’m brokenhearted for the elderly beggars at my window, their bodies withered and twisted. I’m brokenhearted for those who are exploited at their lowest and most vulnerable. I’m brokenhearted for children who grow up in brothels, and literally have no concept of what the word “freedom” means. For the children that see no future and the grown people that see no purpose, that still haven’t encountered God’s healing and renewing love. I’m brokenhearted for the people who believe in a merciless and vengeful God. I’m brokenhearted for the woman in my group the other day that looked so fragile, trying to hide the silent tears that flowed from the corners of her eyes. But I saw your tears… I see you, dear woman. I see you, Bangladesh. God sees you, Bangladesh. The lord has not forgotten or forsaken you.

You see, Bangladesh, though I am brokenhearted I am joyful. Because I see God moving in your hearts and your lives. I see the few people here who have risen up, who fight every day for your hearts and souls. And though the need is overwhelming, and their works seem few and far between, the Lord honors them and multiplies them like the two fish and five loaves of bread that would feed five thousand people(Matthew 14/Luke 9). To you fighters, God sees you fighting. He is using you. Don’t lose heart, he has already overcome this world. And though it seems like your works fade and wither, those seeds are strong and the Lord wills them to grow in the hearts of Bangladesh. Hope is waiting for you, Bangladesh. Even more, it is pursuing you… It shines on your face, like the dawn of a new day. It comes softly and silently, soon the birds will sing their song and the new day will come with its new mercies again.

I have been thinking, as the journey back home lingers in my foresight. Thinking about what God has next, thinking about how part of my heart will still be in Bangladesh. Many of my Bengali friends have tried to explain to me how hard it is when people will come to Bangladesh for just long enough to form relationships with them, and then they leave. A friend was telling me that, in his experience, 90% of people who come to Bangladesh will never come back. People who they considered friends, who came and captured their hearts, gave them hope, and then left. “So I have no hope that you will come back again,” my friend told me. It kind of broke my heart.

I naively thought that I new what to expect. I mean, I knew that it would change my life to meet these people I have heard about, read about, seen pictures of, heart statistics of, etc. But I could never know exactly how it would feel when I saw the love and the pain in their eyes, when I was accepted into their arms and their homes, and received so lovingly. When coming face to face with poverty, abuse, and desperation became part of my daily life. When it became part of my life.

I’m broken hearted to have to say goodbye to my girls, at Uttam’s Place. These girls have truly stolen my heart. Every one of them, it has been amazing to build a relationship with them. To hear a bit of their backgrounds, for them to let me in and know their hearts was such an honor. To dance with them, to play games, to sing with them, to teach them, to hold their tiny little bodies in my arms, to say “I love you,” to make them feel valued. Their hear them all call me Auntie was more beautiful than the hallelujah chorus. I miss them already. Right now my solace is in the Lord, because I know his arms are wrapped around them.

Every single home, church, children’s home, school, etc. that I have had the opportunity to visit has left its mark. For every person that I have met, every single glimmer of hope that has shown in their eyes, a burden sits heavy on my heart. A burden for lost souls, for needy families and a very beautiful, very lost country. I can’t let you go, Bangladesh. And God never has.

I have one week, then I will be back to Sylhet to pack my bags, celebrate, and head home. The prospect of saying goodbye, not knowing when I will see Bangladesh again, leaves a bittersweet taste in my mouth. I have been dreaming of seeing my family and friends back home again, but that means saying goodbye to family and friends here, and the country that has taken such a big part of my heart. So thank you for your prayers as I prepare to say “see you later” to Bangladesh.

Color Camp

As I mentioned in the last post, we had another kids camp. It was a “color camp” that went through the salvation colors. We put together bracelets for all of the kids at the beginning, and we would have color parties, which were basically a series of skits, messages, and activities that revolve around each color (Yellow, black, red, white, yellow). It’s fun way to teach kids about developing your relationship with Christ. The kids had so much fun, they didn’t want to leave. They asked if it could go on an extra day. It was an absolute blast to be with the kids. We did a lot of the same camp stuff you have all heard about and I am really enjoying getting to do skits and clowning. One of those things, I never thought I would be interested in but it was super fun, and I found out it is a great way to incorporate my love of physical humor, theater and ministry. I absolutely love the team we work with, they are so much fun. Many of them are students of young adults with full-time jobs, and it amazes me to see how much time and effort they dedicate to this ministry. They truly have a heart for God and his children, and they challenge me every time I am with them.

It was so wonderful to see God moving in these kids hearts, one of the mornings was especially cool. During prayer and worship time one girl began to cry, and more and more started to. So I began to hold and pray for a couple of the girls, and some of the leaders also started to hold the kids and pray for them and talk with them. I just love seeing these little hearts encounter our incredible God and his love for them. This camp was a success, and sadly my last camp of the semester. Thanks for checking in, I’m keeping this post short and sweet because I have a lot more to write about soon. Thanks for everything, fam!

This Is My God

Hey fam!! This post was written last week, but I couldn’t upload it, so here it is, and in the next couple days I’ll have a new update from this week’s camp. Thanks for checking in! I hope you are doing well and pray that you are all feeling blessed this week. Thanks for all of you who have been praying for me the last few weeks. God has really been stirring my heart lately. For a little while now I have been struggling with just wanting to be here. I think a mixture of culture shock, missing home, and a spiritual battle was causing me to feel frustrated. I just felt like I had lost my passion, and I was feeling kind of selfish and irritated, to be honest. So the past few weeks I have been asking God to renew my passion, to capture my heart again. I wanted to fall in love with his children again, I wanted to fall in love with Bangladesh again.

Friends, the God that I serve is a faithful God. He is faithful to his children, he is faithful to his promises. And I don’t think he will ever refuse our pleas to have love for his children. He won’t ever let our well run dry, if we are seeking him as the source. This God, my God, is a loving God who will never fail us or forsake us. And when I asked this God to renew my heart, he was faithful to his promises.

So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.

 ~2 Corinthians 4:16-18 ESV

Last week we were getting ready for camp, and among the whole rollercoaster of emotions, I was making up work, studying for and finishing my finals early because they were due the exact dates I was supposed to be speaking at camp. I could have declined to come earlier but this was the first ministry opportunity I’d had in a while, and I was one of the main speakers and camp leaders. They were very under-staffed, so I just prayed that God would help me get through it all. I had still yet to prepare my messages until the night before.

To let you in on a guilty little secret, as I was griping about finals and stressed that I wouldn’t finish all that I needed to for camp, I kind of thought God, it would be convenient if camp got postponed to another time... Oh, he said, it’s inconvenient for you… In his gentle way, asking Are we working towards the kingdom of Mical? Or the kingdom of the Prince of Peace? The kingdom of the God who gave everything for you…Is our end goal good grades or lives saved? Needless to say I lowered my head in shame. But he is not the God of condemnation, my God. No, he is the God who empowers.

Isaiah 40:30-31 says, “Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

So I prayed not that my plans would prevail, but that he would empower me to fulfill my responsibilities, and most importantly give me the right words to reach the kids I would speak to. I prayed that he would help me love those kids in a way that would reflect his all-encompassing, Fatherly love for us. And this God of mine, he never fails.

I didn’t get much sleep that night… well actually I didn’t sleep at all that night. But I got everything done. And we packed up the van, and left as the birds chirped their good-morning songs, picking up the three other people who were coming to run the camp. We drove all day and took a fairy to get there, arriving about dinner time. I have to admit, that night I was still having a hard time shaking the grumps, not being able to sleep much in the car. Praying, still, that God would give me the push of energy and love I needed to serve these kids.

We got into the little town and into the campus, and the kids were quickly in our arms, teaching us new games, and giving us love… How humbling. Here I am going to love on these kids and I felt like they were the ones loving on me. Such cool kids. So we hung out with them for the evening, and like every time I pull out my camera with kids here, they ALL wanted to take pictures. There was almost a full-out riot over who got to have their picture taken, but they all got turns. They love it!! (I later found out that it isn’t just children, but that’s another story.) It was so much fun! Some of the kids even knew a little English and were so excited to practice it out on us.

The village people are so precious. I was so blessed by the hospitality of the pastors who hosted us and all the other local people involved. It was such an honor to eat their food and spend time with them and hear a little bit about their hearts for Jesus and the people around them. Man, the pastors in these villages are inspiring. They work so incredibly hard for nothing in return but the glory of God. It challenges me every time I meet another one, serving with absolutely no credit or praise, with their families in these small shacks of houses, serving their people day and night to grow the kingdom. They are humble, hospitable, hardworking, and passionate. If any of you would commit to praying for the pastors here that would be incredible, and you should know that it will make a difference in hundreds if not thousands of lives. Pray that God would continue to provide for them, protect them, sustain them through the hard seasons, keep them healthy, and bring the right people alongside them to support them and help with their work. The burdens of a pastor here are so challenging and so tireless. They need prayer and support so thank you all!!!

As camp went on, I just had a fantastic time. Even before all the activities had begun, they honored us with warm words and bouquets of lovely flowers. Some beautiful young girls in red and orange saris came and presented them to us, it was so sweet! The night went on and I got through it but I was getting exhausted. We had a meeting and then I found out that we were to go around to some different peoples’ houses around the village and pray for them. The group of us went in the dark, by the light of a couple flashlights on the dirt roads, from house to house praying for some of the leaders in the town. They accepted us into their homes and all wanted to serve us snacks and refreshments. As exhausted as I was, it was wonderful. At times I thought I was going to fall asleep as I sat on their wicker furniture praying for the people and families. But being a part of God moving in a place like this is the stuff I live for! I felt like the spirit was flowing through and around us as we walked down the dark path. After a little while we started back towards the campus, which wasn’t far and retired for the night. Man, I slept like a rock that night, and felt a lot better in the morning!

 

The day went on with all the camp fun, and both Ashley and I spoke throughout the day. This is something that God has forced me to work on since being here. I don’t feel good at speaking in front of people in general, and when it comes to preaching, it’s so easy to feel unqualified and I doubt myself. But that’s the thing… God didn’t ask for qualified people. He asks to be the qualification. He wants to be the one, he wants to receive the glory. He doesn’t want our works to point to how wise we are or how good of a speaker we are, and unfortunately his goal isn’t to build up our pride. He wants to tear down all of our self-defenses and change our lives form the inside out. He wants to use us as a channel for his spirit. So God gave me a lot of peace about it. I let him speak through me and I pray that he used my words to speak to the beautiful kids. Our leader, who is actually the first bonafide children’s pastor in Bd, told me that I am a very powerful speaker and he knows that I have a very bright future, which was a huge compliment coming from him. God is so good, I find that he really does love to build us up… not in our own skills or talents, but in Him. I’ve learned that God does not need anything but our willingness. He will never be defeated by our obstacles or hardships. They might be used to discourage us from trying at all, but if we look to the Lord, we know that we can do anything through him. He is the source of our strength, the source of our love and life, and his love for us can not be quenched or overcome. We need to continue to look to him, not at our circumstances, or our worldly difficulties. All he needs from us is a heart that is open to whatever he will do through us.

We spent so much time just hanging out with the kids, having a blast with them and doing a bunch of different activities. I got to be a clown, do skits, dress up in a huge frog suit in which I could only breathe out the eye-hole and dance around. Later that night it just turned into a big dance party, and if you know me, you know I love to dance. Doesn’t matter if I look like a fool, I love it. So we all just went crazy, mostly the kids, Ashley and I, and all the other adults just laughed and shook their heads, although I did get told that I looked like a professional dancer by the pastor(HAHA).

  

It was so much fun dancing with the kids, despite the fact that they were all fighting each other to get to hold Ashley and my hands while dancing. That gave us a good laugh. The kids were just hilarious and adorable, and they just found us absolutely fascinating. Our leader explained later, that foreigners, especially guest speakers usually just do their job and don’t really play or connect with the kids, but that’s my favorite part. I love playing their games and giving lots of hugs, and laughing and dancing with them. Showing them that they are valuable enough for our time. I know they would be valuable enough for Jesus’ time! At the end, the pastor explained that we had really won the children’s hearts, he was very impressed with how we loved on the children, and he would really love for us to come visit and help in his village any time. Such an honor!!! The fact that we made that big of an impact is only God. My heart was just SO full, knowing that God used me to bless them. So full!

 

I keep giving yet my cup runneth over! That was something I talked about in one of my messages, and gave the illustration for. Without his love, we have little to give, and eventually we run dry. We have no more to give. But when we are filled with his love, we overflow. Our lives keep on giving, yet we never run dry. So simple, so elementary, yet I think we often do not understand this concept. We insist on giving from our own well! We don’t tap into our spring of living water! Welllll it feeels good y’all.

The kids were just completely joyous during the whole camp, and we spent every minute we could with them! The first girl to my left in the picture below kept coming to me throughout the days, hugging me and telling me in broken English, “I am so happy, I am so happy!” Some were crying as we left. It broke my heart but I pray that God would continue to work in their hearts and bring them his unending joy and love. And I know that at least for those few days they felt loved, they felt valued like the precious children of God that they are. I hope they find God in new exciting ways and that they continue to grow in him! This week was an answer to prayer! God is so good, and he answers our prayers when our eyes are on him and our hearts are seeking his presence. Praise God for filling me up again, for renewing my heart for the lost. For drawing my eyes from my own self and my own circumstances to those of the lost and hurting. This is my God. He is a God that I always want to become more intimate with, he is a God that I am proud yet humbled to serve, he is a God who is always for us and always with us. What a beautiful God.

  

As always, thank you for everything you do, my friends, family, and support network! You’re amazing, and I feel so loved. We are headed to another camp tomorrow, and I will be excited to report how God moves.

 

I’m Back!!

Friends and family, I am sorry I haven’t posted in so long! I have been distracted with all that’s gone on, and have put it off. But I am excited to share with you what has been happening lately!

Since I last posted, we took our trip to Thailand, and have been back in Dhaka for a couple weeks now.

Thailand was an absolute blast, I had a great time just being in a different atmosphere, with a lot more freedoms. The people of Thailand were wonderful. While we were there we worked with a couple different teams of students and their ministries. We got to work with various Thai churches, teach English and love on children in the slums of Bangkok, spend time with children and young adults at a special needs school.

One of my favorite parts was going into the slums of Bangkok. The first time we went, we walked through the slums, the small buildings crammed together. Looking down, the spaces between the walkway and what they call ‘houses’, the water was black and polluted with garbage. As we walked by the shacks, our leader would call to the children she knew and make sure they were coming. They usually do their lessons in a lady’s house there in the slums but she was gone so we ended up doing the lesson in an open lot filled with garbage, where the children were playing.

    

One of my favorite parts of the trip was a time when we were teaching another group of kids in another slum. While we had our group, we were dancing and singing and playing games and a young girl was hanging around, weaving in and out of our fun, but didn’t participate with us when I would try to wave her over. So we moved on to another part of the slum near by and everyone was playing a game, but I had sat out. So finally the girl came over I got her to play with me and along came another two young boys who I had seen with no clothes, playing in the dirt and garbage…

I had the small girl with torn clothes and missing teeth riding piggy back, and the naked little boys covered in filth inching closer to get tickled. Their laughs echoed through the slums, bringing joy to their dark surroundings like water in the desert… This is what I imagine when Jesus said let the little children come to me…

I imagine it was the dirty, unkept,  and poor children that ran to Jesus with utter joy in their beautiful faces. The kids who were unloved. The kids whose pleas fell on deaf ears here. The kids that never would have been allowed in the temples. I imagine these were the kids that Jesus held in his arms. I know for a fact that these are the kids Jesus gave his life for. And on the tough days, it’s these kids smiles that remind me why I love what I am doing here.

Another fun thing we got to do was celebrate Songkran with the kids and young adults at a special needs school. Songkran is a very big water festival holiday for Thailand, it went on for the last 5 days we were there. So all over the city people splashed buckets of ice water on you or smeared talcum powder on your face as a sort of blessing. It was a lot of fun. I really enjoyed the special needs school especially. I have always had a huge heart for special needs kids, so I felt so blessed to be a part of their celebrations. I got to dance and basically have a big water fight with all the kids there. Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures from the special needs school. The pictures below are from other fun Songkran celebrations, including the moshpit of foam! We would pour Jasmin water on the elders at the church as a blessing, as you can see below. It is definitely rivaling Christmas as my new favorite holiday!

I heard some really awesome testimonies, met some awesome leaders and students, experienced a new culture, got to explore some historical sites, meet people who are a big part of the awesome things God is doing there, and just had an all around fun time. It was a really nice break and a chance to relax and not have to worry about unrest or just the everyday customs of Bd. It seems a lot more Western in Thailand, so it felt a little more like home.

We are back in Bangladesh now, have been for a couple weeks now. The first week we were back in Sylhet with the family, working on various projects around the house, which is going to be turned into a guesthouse when the Barthalows are back in the states. There’s me painting!

I wish I had better news right now but since I have been back, the political unrest only seems to be escalating. As many of you have seen, there was a huge building that collapsed recently in Dhaka, and they have counted more than 600 people dead and hundreds of other people injured. So the country has really been mourning over that loss and on top of the other political issues lately, there have been violence and protests for better working conditions in response to the event. Bangladesh isn’t always quite this bad but as a friend who is also doing work in this country posted, “In a culture unsaturated by the Truth of forgiveness, the main reaction to wrongdoing and tragedy is violence. Please continue to pray for this great nation.” This country is grappling for whatever control they can get, when what they need is grace. What they need is love. They need the truth, they need Jesus. I think the hardest part is the fact that when I am staying indoors and out of danger, I can’t be out there sharing that truth. When there are country-wide demonstrations, protests, rallies, strikes, etc. (which is a LOT of the time), I am not allowed to go out. Sometimes we will be able to stay at a ministry location, but even most the normal ministries they usually do have been cancelled on these days. It is frustrating. And I sometimes wonder why I can’t be out; I can’t help but want to be amidst the violence speaking truth rather than sitting, quietly waiting for the next fleeting chance, but God has other plans for me right now. I continue to rest in my Beloved’s promises, draw closer to his voice, and let him prepare my heart for the opportunities that he will provide. Sometimes we feel as though we are waiting for our “such a time as this,” but I believe that every day is your “such a time as this.” This is your day to shine. Doesn’t matter what you are doing, you can draw closer to the Lord and reflect his light wherever you are.

Poverty, human trafficking, and violence, as heartbreaking as they are, aren’t the only issues. And food, shelter, and healthcare are not the only things that these people need. It is so easy to get focused merely on the physical, and though I do think that is very important, sometimes God requires you to sit quietly and fight the spiritual battle. Your prayers continue to encourage and sustain me, I can’t tell you how much it means that you are all lifting me up in that way. I am honored to have you all fight these battles with me. Remember that third world countries aren’t the only places that have a war waged over them. Ultimately poverty, human trafficking, violence and other world issues aren’t our true battles, the fight is a deeper fight. And the people around you are worth fighting for too.  Don’t forget to lift up the people you work with, the people you see at coffee shops or the grocery store, the people who don’t ever agree with you, the people who seem spoiled and get on your nerves, all the ones who are hard to love. They may not be suffering from malnutrition or living on the streets but we are all in need of love and forgiveness! I pray that God would give you a broken heart and a passion for the lost around you.

I know some of you have heard on facebook that we had a loss in our family recently, and that has been pretty rough over the past few days. It was really heartbreaking and unexpected, and I know those that were very close to the person are having a very hard time with the loss. It has hit me hard as well. Thank you for your prayers for our family, you have surrounded us with comfort and peace through your prayers. God is the same God yesterday, today, and forever and we know that he is holding on our loved one in heaven right now.

I have definitely been missing home over the last month, and I can’t wait to see you all soon. Less than 2 months to go! I will be sad to leave but I have to say I do miss my country roads, starry skies, my small town friends and family. And food. I have a list of food I can’t wait to eat. 🙂 So bless you all, I will be praying for you!!

Also, I just wanted to give a shout out for my friend Jen. Jennifer truly makes the world a better place. Even in her darkest times she is an encourager to others and her positivity is a light to those around her. She has two sweet daughters and a husband who loves her immensely. She has been given an impending time-frame to get a life-saving bone marrow transplant. If you or any of your friends and family can donate or spread the word, or still have yet to register at <getswabbed.org>, please do. Every bit helps. This life is so precious to us, and we don’t want to let her go just yet. If you have wanted a chance to change or save someone’s life, this could be your chance, and I can’t think of a better recipient. This is your “such a time as this,” so give as you feel led. Love you, Jennifer.

To donate go to:    http://www.gofundme.com/Lets-Save-Jen?pc=fb_cr

and

Check out her story on her personal blog!:   http://blog.jenniferpricepollard.com/

 

If you have any questions or comments, feel free to shoot me an email at the1movement@live.com any time or comment away on here! I appreciate your words and prayers!

Mical

Teen Camp

          

Truly, Madly, Deeply

Wow, a lot has happened over the last couple weeks, I really owe you guys an update! I have had a lot to process, and God has been stirring my heart. I can say that I am falling truly, madly, and deeply in love–with Jesus, with his children, with Bangladesh. Since I last posted, we have worked with Uttam’s Place, the tutoring center for girls out of the slums, and various other places and events. A couple groups of girls come throughout the day at the Place, and are provided with a meal, shower, a chance to clean their clothes, help with school, English training and more. I got to do an art class, work on English with the girls, play Uno, talk about our different lives, and more. Our plan for the few weeks that we will be with them is to work on fine arts, English, and computer skills. Basically what they need is for us to provide these girls with practical skills to help them succeed, and loving, Godly relationships . It does my heart good to be with these girls.

It is a beautiful thing to be in the center of God’s will, because when your heart beats for that which God’s heart beats, your attempts to bless others only come back to bless you tenfold.  These girls are intelligent, resilient, and such beautiful works of our creator. If you look at their surroundings, it is hard to see a future. But if you look at these girls, if you look at their hearts, you see hope. You see a purpose. You see a future. You see Jesus.

It was humbling to see all the time and effort of people that is invested in the girls, to meet these people who have nothing yet give everything because their heart beats like Jesus. It was also humbling to begin to build a relationship with the girls… It was a slow process for what time we are given, but some things will always surpass the language/culture barrier. A warm hug and a genuine smile, these things are universal. Jesus love pouring out of us is universal, and I thank our beloved for that.

For a few nights during that time we stayed at a Bengali family’s house. It was an honor to sit with them, to eat with them, to get a little taste of their life. It was a family who has a HUGE heart for Jesus, and hearing about their passion and ministry was very inspiring. I was very challenged by talking with them. During our time they talked to me about a friend of theirs, a young Bengali man who has grown up in their street ministry. They told me about a trip that they had went on recently for which this young man sold his cell phone–probably one of his only possessions–to go with trek to a far away village lugging all sorts of equipment through the pouring rain and flood just to love on these people who didn’t even speak the same language–to be the hands and feet of our savior. I sat there in awe of such a sacrifice. I continued to hear more stories, some of which I can’t post, and it was incredibly humbling. It challenged and convicted me to keep checking my heart that I am not holding anything back.

 It’s so easy for me to make excuses for myself. I am an excellent excuse-maker, and I will admit that I groaned a little bit inside as God started to work on my heart. There some things that are just out of my comfort zone that I need to give to God, but He is SO patient with me, and He continues to bring people into my life that encourage, inspire, and challenge me. And I rest in His word and His truth. He comforts and sustains me. I genuinely thank you for your prayers as I continue to work on these things. This is a journey, and I am a work in progress. There is always more we can surrender, but as I was reminded in Mark Batterson’s The Circle Maker, we aren’t going to remember the things that come easy, we are going to remember the things that come through the blood, sweat, tears, and prayers. The victorious things, the glorious things, they take purification through fire. Those are the things worth living for. Those are the things we are called to. Those are the things God’s heart beats for! Joy Jeshu!

Not everything has gone as we might have planned (TIB!), and it has taken self-control to refrain from being frustrated with hartals and things that “get in the way” of our plans. I struggle at times to maintain an eternal mindset. But we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. (Romans 8:28) I am reminded of God’s sovereign hand on all things, and I am reminded that nothing could ever separate us. So we continue to pray that whatever the situation might be we would still give our whole hearts to serving in whatever way we can.

Another great thing I got to do is help out at  a teen camp. These kids were a group of young teens from a street-kid outreach. Again, humbling, because I didn’t feel like there was a lot I could do. None of these kids spoke English and I suck at any attempt to speak or understand Bangla, and it was a last minute thing that we could go along with them because other plans fell through. So I worked with a group of kids along with another Bengali leader (the person who actually knew what was going on) and we did devotionals, worship, skits, games, etc etc. One thing I got to do was serve with my photography, so that’s good. There was one time where they were playing this game and I had to go up and do a little impromptu dance. They got a kick out of that, and of course I am always up for dancing. Ashley and I also had the honor of dressing up in a big fox(me) and frog(her) costume and doing a little skit for the kids. The skit was supposed to be about friendship and at the end I went in for a hug but we pretty much ended up head-butting and looking like we were about to wrestle (hahaha) but the kids got the point… I think. These kids were amazing, and I just wanted to take them all home with me! Like I said, I am falling in love!! Again, the team who put this together was incredibly humbling. They were the same team that put on the Children’s Ministry Leadership Conference we went to before, and it amazes me how much they do. They are truly people after God’s heart and I can’t count the ways God has used them, and will continue to use them.

It’s an odd kind of sacrifice, to be okay with not being used to your ‘fullest advantage.’ Something that Ashley said that has challenged me, (and I might have already mentioned it), is that the true test of the gifts God has given you is if you are willing to NOT use them. That has been something I am struggling with. I don’t feel like I am serving in ways that I excel, if you know what I mean. God has been calling me to do things I am not necessarily good at, and to me that feels like a lot more sacrifice. Confession: I can be very prideful! It’s easy to give up your strengths, when you are talented and you can point to God, but you have to give up your pride to do things that you aren’t good at, or you are self-conscious about and still point to God. ‘Cause, man lets face it, we wouldn’t do Him justice anyway. Even the most talented man on the planet, in any facet, would not hold a candle to the glory of God. So we are called to give him everything we have. And that includes all our deepest darkest fears and shameful insecurities. (yikes!)  God wants my willingness and that is what I am trying to give him.

We had the privilege of attending a Palm Sunday service at another local church that I hadn’t been to before. It was a beautiful experience. The building was packed, sweat trickled down my face, and we praised God. (What can I say? I am a northwest girl, and I really appreciated the fans that night!!) We got to take palm leaves, some in weaved into the shape of crosses, and walk around the church neighborhood singing and waving our palm leaves. It was kind of surreal, in a holy way… I could almost feel the anticipation of Jesus coming round the corner through the dirt and pebble streets. When we got back from around the block and went up to the top of the building, the service commenced and after a little while got interrupted. There was a man who insisted that he needed to stop the speaker and deliver his own message. He was yelling and trying to disrupt the service, and eventually they had to physically remove him from the building, because it was clear that he was not of good intentions. The pastor reported that there had been things and people trying to hinder the service all day… but God prevailed, and the service went on. It was exhilarating… I think we can say that if forces were working that hard to keep it from happening, God was doing great things!!

For the Easter weekend we went out to the Home of Hope! We didn’t get to stay long but the time there was awesome. We got there the day before Easter and I got to play with the kids, eat with them, spend time with them… And I also got to eat at a local pastor’s  house that night, and it was such an honor to be with him and his family. To see what they do, how much they sacrifice just to serve those around them was amazing. We stayed that night at the home, I  got sick and didn’t sleep all night and everybody got up for a sunrise service Easter morning. I was so excited for this service and I prayed that God would just let me get through the service without getting sick, and He did! I felt fine as I did a short object lesson, another brother  gave a message, and we did a little skit, etc. Our speaker, a really awesome guy with a family I have come to know and love since being here spoke, and talked about how God uses the unlikely, and that was awesome! It spoke to me and I think it really spoke to the kids and the others there. Thank you God for using the unlikely, the unqualified and the unimpressive. We love you so much and we are blessed to experience your presence in our lives. Your mercy and grace have given us a life abundant in you. We are no longer oppressed by our imperfections but are free to seek you, to joyfully share your forgiveness and praise your holy name. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. For your love. For your sacrifice. For the life you give breathe into us daily.

So… we are off to Thailand in a couple days and I would appreciate your prayer as we travel to this new place. I am so excited to be going and experiencing a new environment, new people and a whole new ministry. We will be working with another program like Engage, with students that live in Thailand and do ministry there. I don’t know at all what to expect so I am praying that God would give me the tools, the wisdom, and the willingness to do whatever He has for me. We will pretty much doing two weeks straight of ministry with no hartals to speak of! I am stoked and I can’t wait to tell you all about it!

Always, thank you for blessing me continually with your prayers. I am incredibly humbled by your love and support. I pray that each of you are falling truly, madly, and deeply in love with our savior as he is with you, and I hope that my experiences and challenges might bless you or speak to you in some way as you experience it all with me! Thanks so much for reading. Until later, M.

P.s. check in soon, pictures to come!

Camp

I want to thank you all for your prayer about this weekend! Camp was a total success and I truly believe your prayers were a part of that! God is so good, despite all of the obstacles we faced that could have stopped camp from happening, he orchestrated everything. We were delayed one night because of the hartal, but we made it!  There were tons of fun  games, crafts, dances, activities, messages, skits, devotional times, and worship times. And meals! Good old curry… Breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

I was a team leader for 18 people including my counselors, and I really felt a connection with the kids on my team. We worked together to make a team chant, to make a team poster, to organize and perform a skit, and do our games, activities and devotionals together. It was great to see them enthused, working as a team, and seeking God together. I had such cool kids on my team, I was so sad to have to say goodbye after so short of a time, but they still have a special place in my heart and in my prayers and hopefully I will get to see some of them again!

Of course my favorite times were the worship and prayer times. The kids  have a blast doing upbeat action songs, it’s hard to keep the silly grin off your face while dancing and singing with them! It is SO cool to see these kids seeking and encountering the presence of God!! A huge highlight for me was alter-call where we got to pray for the kids. The worship was so anointed and the presence of God was so tangible.  I was just struck with awe at the love I have for these kids I didn’t really know, as I held their little bodies  praying for them; experiencing even such a small part of the love God has for them was overwhelming and brought me to tears.  Their hearts are so beautiful and I see such an incredible future for each and every one of them, and it is a continual reminder that the Lord says,

I tell you the truth: unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. (Matt 18:3,4)

I wish I could have taken pictures during that time to show you how awesome these kids were just embracing God’s presence, but I was busy at this point. 🙂  Some more highlights were watching the kids play games, especially the water fight at the end. I love seeing them run around with silly big grins on their faces, and splashing in the well.  It was also fun to hear the kids scream their chants throughout camp, with such energy and enthusiasm. There was definitely some creativity and I love how they really pointed towards Jesus in their chants. 🙂 Go kids!!

There was lots more but I will leave you with that for now. God is good, forever and always. Here’s a few of the pictures I got at camp. Please do not use them without my permission.

      

February Pictures #2